This is a conversation I had with God in my journal Feb 12, 2015. I find it to be really powerful as I read it back to myself exactly 4 years later after I had wrote the initial conversation down. Back story of this conversation with God in my journal, I was feeling something really heavy that I wanted answers to and I kept hearing: can you trust that I know? So I decided to write that down and begin a dialogue of finding out what they heck that meant. Read with an open heart.
G: Can you trust that I know?
Me: Yes, I want to. I really want to surrender everything onto you.
G: What is stopping you?
Me: Fear that you don’t really know because I see such horrendous atrocities happening with people on this planet. No one should be going through that then, why are they happening? Can’t you – the almighty powerful God stop them?
God: I am no mediator between what is wrong or right. I don’t make judgements or give out punishments, and I certainly do not authorize control over anyone. You are made, as I made you, which is in my image. How then, can I not put limits on me, but put limits on you? I don’t, but you do because you believe yourself to be less than me. The horrendous atrocities happen to the body – not the Spirit. You are not your physical body, but your Spirit in my body. What you call atrocities here on Earth are just a representation of what is in the mind’s of the people here on Earth. You are taught to project your hate outwards, you are to blame, condemn, hurt, seek revenge because that is how your mind makes meaning of outward events. You must realize that all outward events are projections of what you hold in your mind, and that your mind must be examined to understand where it has created separation between you and another. This separation you feel because you think your way into knowing that you are these physical bodies, but you are not. You do not just stop where the body does. It’s your only requirement to know yourself as I see you: whole, compete and loved.
Me: How? Instructions? How do I see myself as you see me?
G: Don’t look outward or outside of yourself to understand how you seem to me. You are not a body to me with eyes, a nose or hair. You are myself. How does God see himself? You see, here we don’t have mirrors. God looks within, he feels his Beingness, his light, his expansiveness.
Me: This question comes to mind. How would one understand themselves if there were no mirrors or eyes to look at a reflection?
G: You will see what is in your mind. What you carry inside you – you will see outside of you. If you create any separation between you and I, which you are very good at doing then, you see two, when there is really one.
Me: Well how do I know you as one with me? All I’ve experienced is apartness from you except a few times that I’ve been out by the water where I felt from within your presence.
G: You keep looking outside of you for your oneness with me. What you’re looking for you will not see with your physical eyes. Every time you feel any feeling of love, expansiveness, lightness, deep joy or gratitude you have become me and I have become you. You have created the space for yourself to experience the oneness that we are. But you see, you hardly allow yourself to do this because you are so stubborn in believing you are separate from me! So you begin to fear, recede into darkness. I didn’t create darkness, you did, to justify why you feel the way you do. Where there is darkness there is still presence of light because you can’t really be in darkness, you just cover your eyes voluntarily because you think darkness is where you belong. That’s why you will always see that even when there is darkness, there will always be a light present, You, it’s within not on the outside.
Me: I want to feel connected to you, right now. How?
G: The connection between us cannot be severed or broken, but it can be forgotten because you choose to. Remember no matter what I am always with you. Say this: I am at home in God. Feel how this feels to you. We are together each time you remember we are not apart.