I woke up at 4am today for my flight to Maui. So far I’ve been to San Jose and Seattle – both new airports for me. My flight to Maui leaves at 5:30pm. I am going for the second time in one year! How cool is that! I definitely feel Maui has a special place in my heart – maybe I’ll live there someday?
A secret dream is to have a farm with lots of fruit trees, coconut trees and a free and wild animal sanctuary overlooking the ocean. How dreamy!
Aside from the long travel day, this past week has been emotionally exhausting. We drove to Austin on Thursday, arriving on Friday afternoon to a horror of an apartment. A dark smokey basement apartment, gross and not at all what I had expected home to look like after a 24 hour plus drive cross-country.
I started crying and panicking – what the hell were we going to do? Now that we drove all the way cross-country to have this place to call home. We decided to not take the apartment and really pulled a trust card. I got the intuitive hit to look on Craigslist to see if there were any other apartments available and low behold we found another apartment!
We got the place with such a breeze. It’s on the 4th floor overlooking a park with a modern feel. Kind of exactly what I asked the Universe to find. It was truly magical and miraculous! I will forever have this experience to constantly remind me of the miracle of trust and faith, plus how God really works in the most outrageously funny yet larger than your perspective ways!
I am so grateful and humbled to be enveloped with the love of God! The Universe has my back. Since then, I’ve begun to realize a few things: I am huge worry wort. I am constantly worrying! After the shock to my ego-mind with the apartment fiasco, I’ve really begun to take a hard look at how my mind spends so much energy playing out worry fueled scenario, which cause me so much anxiety.
It’s a funny thing how our mind takes us into a reality, all while our physical body is still in the now. This has come to teach me evidently that fear is a thought, a perception, a keyhole though which we attempt to see the big picture. A shift in perception is the opening of the door to redefine that the perspective is so much bigger than whatever the tiny mad idea, fear shows us – a keyhole view – making us believe that it’s the whole wide world!
Another thing I’ve learned is the power in trust. We must trust and hold the faith when it looks, feels and tastes like it isn’t gonna work. That’s when faith becomes your anchor and where faith is asking you to hold on. Faith is a practice, a muscle we can build. And faith is always our point of power when the pressure is on.
This is the only time to practice faith. When things are fine and dandy – we cannot know the power of faith. Its only when the tides rise – we must anchor ourselves into faith to carry us to shore. But we must keep the faith! This has been the biggest blessing and learning experience I’ve had this past week.
I’ve learned to trust more, worry less, let go, let God and basically chill the fuck out.
God can take better care of your life than you can. You just got to stop getting in the way. Now, I am awakened again to the power that lies within us all. The guidance that innately lives within us all and the force that always know more than we can know.
I trust because worrying doesn’t feel good. So I’ve made trust my companion because it reassures me that with it I’ll always feel good.
We have to feel good about ourselves if we are to feel God within us.
*This blog post is writings from my journal
How do you keep the faith?